POSTMATES

Netflix started streaming their movies cause they were getting killed with shipping costs and losing to Blockbuster. The problem was any movies they could secure the rights to were trash that nobody wanted to watch. I watched shit on there anyway, cause it was cool that I could just stream them.

My friends and I gathered in my apartment to watch classics like this 2005 masterpiece, “Pervert!”

Comparitively, we all were thrilled in 2008, when Netflix duped short sited cable channels like Epix and Starz (WITH A Z!) to sign deals with them to essentially take a small payment to hand over all their content to another company. You can tune in at a specific time to catch the latest Transformers on Epix, or watch it at your own convenience on Netflix. Now everyone has Netflix. It’s almost weird to not have it. It’s a utility, like water or gas. And cable is non-essential. A luxury. The deals with amazon are even running out but now they’re so powerful and have so much of their own shit, who cares if they don’t have “The Hunger Games” any more? They’ve already won.

Similar things are happening within Amazon. Slowly they become less and less reliant on the name brand things they sell and make their own version for less. Search amazon for batteries, diapers, light bulbs, surge protectors….it’s all amazon produced shit. But they got that app on your phone selling us the stuff we knew. We got used to it. Now it’s all we know.

So this Postmates thing. Or grubhub. Eventually one of them will eat the other. What’s gonna happen: we’re gonna put the app on our phones. We’re gonna get used to their service. It’s convenient to just have stuff brought to your house. Restaurants advertise for them. They get business…what do they care? They don’t have to pay drivers and they get orders from the people too lazy to drive there. Win/win. Once we all get that app though…..maybe postmates just starts offering us their own burger cheaper. Maybe they cut the restaurants out all together. I’m not saying this happens tomorrow. Netflix took a good 8-9 years to get where they are….and even that is pretty fast. It really depends on how lazy we all get and how slow postmates’ “partners” are to adapt. Walmart is doing free 2 day shipping now. They knew they needed to adapt to combat Amazon. The worst part of Walmart is going to Walmart….which is the whole reason Target is still allowed to exist.

Price has become secondary to convenience.

On demand has replaced appointment television.

Energizer may keep going and going and going, but I’m not going going going to the store to get them. Bring me whatever you got.

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